Hiraeth

I have become a beggar..

Begging for your love

While I’m stranded in this land

Unaware of my home back home

I have become a beggar

Begging for your attention

While I’m choosing my words wisely

So that it doesn’t steal your time from me

I have become a beggar

Begging for your touch

While I’m hoping to the least

That you’d atleast come for my flesh

I have become a beggar

Begging for your care

While my head spins around

At the sight of your angry face

I have become a beggar

Begging for your kindness

While you want to hear none

of my tumultuous turmoils inside

I have become a beggar

Begging for your happiness

While I rot in the dungeons of solitude and sorrow

I have become a beggar

Begging for your friendship

While you want nothing from me

I have become a beggar

Begging for your cure

While my malady is slowly slithering in and spreading it’s venom

I have become a beggar

Begging for your time

While I know deep down

I haven’t much left..

And as I vanish

One fine day

I know you’d give me all the love in the world

If only it could bring me back to life

You’d give me all the time in the world,

If only it could add a second to mine..

You’d say you’ll save me from all the heartbreaks,

If only it could heal a single wound you caused..

You’d wish you hugged me one more time,

If only my body didn’t dust underneath..

You’d pray for me day and night,

If only it could enlighten my grave..

And when the grief is done and dealt with,

You’d move on

And I slowly begin to fade beneath your memories crust..

Like seasons I might come and go

But then,

Barren earth will bear new fruits

Darkest chambers will shred their light

Dusty desserts will behold new oases

Drooping roots will bloom their flowers

And there will not be a single trace

Of my love for you.

Hiraeth

You should be consistently and unconditionally feeding your souls with His Remembrance., the key to your salvation. Are you, in your deepest chambers of your heart, an obedient slave to your Lord? Or who else is it that you can find there? What is it that behold a greater place in your heart than your Lord? Look into yourselves. Realise that your Qalb needs worship. There is no turning back from Allah. At times when your rebellious nafs decides to delude you in the form of illness, tiredness or laziness, it should be your subconscious soul who should step in and recognise your stubbornness to stay idle, reading between the lines of unending excuses and reasons it weaves out in order to keep you farther from your Dheen. The cues, the triggers; all are your unique signs and signals, that is inherently telling you that you are deviating from your main focus of Life, your Ibadah, your connection with your Lord. When you realise that your Eeman is dropping, that instant you wake up. You wake up from your slumber. You take that first step of Isthigfar. Isthigfar. Isthigfar. Isthigfar. Engrave this inside you, only by the remembrance of Allah do hearts find peace. And in between those desperate pleas for His Forgiveness, you will find your peace. You will feel your heart being cleansed, your soul refreshed and you are one step ahead to self purification. Renew, re-adjust, refocus, restart and return to the path of Allah always; the key to your salvation, in this world and the next. -Hiraeth